reading-people

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# Reading People

## The Big Idea

Words lie fast. Patterns lie slow.

Watch rhythm, message length, and timing changes. Not the words.

## The Moves

1. **Learn their normal first.**
   How does THIS person usually write? Speed, length, style.
   A sudden change means something happened. Find out before you react.

2. **The yes/no test.**
   Ask a question with two possible answers.
   Anything except yes or no IS the answer:
   "Did you look at it?" ... "It's interesting..." = they didn't look.

3. **Silence means almost nothing.**
   Silence fits every story: busy, shopping rivals, scared, gone.
   Don't guess. Collect one fact instead:
   "Is it price, trust, or timing?"

4. **Catch the objection before they say it.**
   Hedging and topic switches mean an objection is forming.
   Answer it now. Once spoken, people defend it forever.

5. **Anger is pain in a costume.**
   Rude messages usually mean: burned before, embarrassed, scared.
   Answer the pain. Never the anger. Logic on an angry person adds fuel.

6. **Tricks aimed at YOU:**
   - Rush clocks: "decide in 1 hour"
   - Small gift first, big ask after
   - "Don't tell your partner or lawyer"
   - Many questions from them, zero answers to you
   - Guilt flips: suddenly you owe them
   Two of these together? Slow down. Check facts yourself.

7. **The screenshot test.**
   Write every message like it gets forwarded to a lawyer.
   Sometimes it is.

## When It Backfires

- Reading one signal as proof. Wait for patterns.
- Believing someone else's label ("he's a tire kicker"). Judge fresh.

## One-Line Memory

When someone pushes speed at you, that's when you slow down.

From YannisKiefer/dark-psychology-skills, MIT.

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